Olivia Dynell

Tiny Angel’s Walk to help celebrate memory of girl

By ERIN PUSTAY

Erin.Pustay@IndeOnline.com

Denise Skinner lost her heart last August when her daughter, Olivia Dynell, born three months premature, stole it. She held it tight in her tiny, little fingers and never once let go.

Even now, more than a year after Olivia’s death, she still has her mama’s heart.

“Olivia has really touched my life,” Denise said. “I will never be the same again, ever.”

When Denise left the Aultman Hospital, having lost one of the most precious gifts that God had ever given her, the hospital gave her a small ceramic necklace to remember her daughter. The middle of the heart-shaped charm could be removed and Denise had it buried with Olivia.

Everyday, the outer piece of that charm hangs on a small chain that graces Denise’s neck. In a small way, it signifies that Olivia will always be close to her mama’s heart.

Learning to hold on and let go at the same time is one of the hardest things a parent could ever go through, said Tiffany Foxx, founder and director of the locally-based God’s Tiny Angels Support Group. Foxx, who has lost an infant herself, discovered that working through grief was something that required time, patience and tons of hugs.

The group still meets regularly at the Massillon Family YMCA to support each other, share stories and find strength they never knew existed in themselves.

“No one is ever going to feel like they are alone again,” Foxx said. “We are going to meet and I am going to reach out to whoever I can so that we can go through this together.”

Until Foxx reached out to Denise and her husband Oscar, they did feel alone, swallowed by their grief. Through the group, they found hope.

“It is just an awesome place, where you can feel free to talk about your grieving process because there are people there who can walk in your shoes,” Denise said. “It’s hard for women, especially, because this baby grew inside of us and was a part of us. I think we grieve a little deeper.”

Denise’s grief ran deeper still. Until Olivia, Denise was told that she could not conceive. Although they were always been happy together, the 40-year-old couple found unmatchable joy in the news of Denise’s miracle pregnancy.

“I was elated for the simple fact that we didn’t think she could have kids,” Oscar said of hearing the news. “We sat there and cried, right there in the (hospital) room.

The news was a breath of refreshing and a renewing life for Denise. Oscar, like any expectant father, did all he could to welcome his baby girl into the world. He set right away to the task of getting the nursery ready and pampering the mom-to-be. For six months, Oscar said, everything was perfect. For six months, it was as if every blessing in the world belonged to the Skinners. But in that final month of pregnancy, they received devastating news.

Denise had been diagnosed with fibroid tumors and the baby’s growth had been stunted.

“(The doctor) said that 9 out of 10 times, the baby might not make it,” Oscar said. “He said, ‘if you go through this full term, you put (Denise) and the baby in jeopardy. You have save one or the other or lose both. … We have got to make a decision.’”

In the days and weeks following the loss of their little girl, Denise and Oscar could do nothing but grieve. Although she was so tiny and so young, Olivia had brought her parents the kind of joy they had never imagined. Losing that joy – that child – in a single instant was more than they thought they could bear.

“Sometimes, we would just lay in the bed, watch TV and hug,” Oscar said. “We asked the normal question of ‘why’ … (but) it was just meant to be.”